Race this...

Alright newbie swimmer at the pool who decided to try something new for your New Year's resolution, listen up.


Normally, I'm welcoming with open arms. If you ask questions, I'll probably even stop- in the middle of a set- to answer them. I'll smile and give you a head nod while I'm using the kickboard. I'll even forgive you for walking across my lane while I'm swimming. I'm nice like that.

However, Mr. Too Much Testosterone, do not race me every time I come to the wall. I know you're trying hard. But, guess what? I'm doing drills. I'm only swimming with one arm. Yeah. One arm. And, I'm still beating you. Notice my fists are closed? I'm still beating you.

If you want to race, call me on it. Say, "Hey! I want to prove to you how fast I am, so let's race!"

I'll smile.

I'll say Ready... Set... Go!

I might even let you get to the flags before I start, just so that your ego isn't bruised, too badly.

So, check your ego at the door. I'm not trying to race you. If you want to know if you can keep up, then start after me and see if you can stay on my toes. I'm not that fast. Lots of people can put my ego in check, but I'm smart enough not to leave the wall at the same time they do.

When I lap you twice on a 400 set, it's not necessary to get out and stomp out of the pool. We have different goals. You don't need to prove anything. Let's just be friends.

P.S. You might want to try putting your head "IN" the water.

11 comments:

Jason said...

I'm sorry.....I did not meant to ruin your swim and I will ask next time if we can RACE.....ha ha ha!

Unknown said...

I love it when people try to race. Even slow play it a little bit just to give them a false sense of confidence. Good times!

Unknown said...

I know I am bad. I wish I had someone good like you at my pool. I look at people in the pool that are doing things that I know are wrong and think, gosh, do I look that slow? And then they pass me. Ugh. The worst was the guys who were "SURE" total immersion swimming was going to fix me. Honestly, getting stronger is what will fix me, and not being afraid to be tired in the pool. I am actually not doing as much wrong as I first thought, thankfully, and slowly but surely, improving.

Julie said...

LOL! That is funny!

TriMOEngr said...

Oh no - do you think when I race people to liven up my workout I'm being a pain in the ass? That said, I don't stomp out of the pool. So maybe I'm not a douche like that guy. Way to kick butt even without trying though. Go you!

Jon said...

I love this! It's so true! Big muscles in water don't necessarily equal speed.

Big Daddy Diesel said...

We werent racing??? I thought you said go!! Come to think of it, my shoulder was really bothering me yesterday, maybe was at 50%..... and I didnt stomp off .....HMPFFFFF!!!! *sniff mommmmyyyyyy!!!!*

ONEHOURIRONMAN said...

Or "Hey butt head, I'm an Ironman.. buzzz off"

Christi said...

Okay, that is just too funny!

Karen said...

Hilarious! sad but true...

Rach @ Girl on the Run said...

Hah! I'm def in the "new pool" club. But I won't be trying to race anyone, because even a sloth can be in the water....I am so slow!

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